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If you know who Sting (formerly of the rock group The Police) is, you’ll have at least a superficial knowledge of what tantric sex is. In a 1990s interview with famed philanthropist Bob Geldof, Sting claimed to have 7-hour tantric love sessions with his longtime partner, Trudie Styler.
While he later admitted that he was making a “drunken brag”, the rocker is a lifelong proponent of tantra and its gifts to human sexuality. So, is tantra the secret sauce of this famous couple’s longevity?
You may never know for sure but here, Top Drawer Toys will clue you in on the ancient Hindu (later, Buddhist) practice of tantric sex, what it is, and its benefits to sexual health.
The Unlimited Power of the Divine Feminine
While all sexual encounters may not have what might be described as a spiritual component, tantric love is a 1,500 year old tradition that transgresses physical boundaries to unite sexual partners in a spiritually elevated and informed way.
Medieval India was politically fractured as two major dynasties collapsed, replaced by a plethora of minor kingdoms. The emerging tantric tendency in Hinduism appealed to the lesser rulers of these upstart kingdoms, superficially interpreting the promises of power in Tantric writings and thus, diffusing them beyond India.
In Shakti, the tantric goddess embodying the divine feminine, we see the radicalism of tantra. It is Shakti who animates the material world. While she is the principal goddess, all female deities in the tradition were a departure from the nurturing, passive role usually ascribed to feminine deities. She was dangerous, erotic, and infinitely powerful, the very building blocks of tantric sex.
What Is Tantric Sex?
The act of tantric love is a reification of divine union and the reconciliation of all things in the sex act. Female partners represent the divine feminine energy of the universe (wisdom), uniting with the divine masculine energy (compassion).
It is this tremendous spiritual reality that lies behind tantric sex and understanding the enormity of it is your first job, if this yogic sexual practice interests you. This is not sex with the aim of orgasm (although, we all love those). What’s different about tantric sex is its lofty spiritual focus, removing the drive to an ecstatic conclusion by slowing the journey down to a luxuriously sensual crawl. In that sensual, spiritual crawl is the stuff of the heavens. The physical is united with the spiritual. Universal male energy is united with universal female energy. In the act of tantric sex is divine cosmic healing.
The Joys of Tantric Love
Tantric love, to be concise, is “slow food” sex. The idea is not to rush to orgasm but to delay it for the sake of the journey. The spiritual element is a journey of discovery, as sensuality and the focus on union (both cosmic and physical) are paramount.
Tantric sex is what happens when you discover your own body and that of your partner, with a higher purpose. In that higher purpose is a means of rediscovering the sensual element of sexuality as a healing balm for you, your partner, and the fractured universe around us. Because of its spiritual focus, tantra allows you to let go of performance anxiety and negative attitudes about your body.
Tantric practice may not have been designed to alleviate modern sexual dysfunction but in our times, it’s a helpful tool that can not only bring you joy but a more harmonious sex life. It’s the key to sexual wellness for many for that reason.
Those approaching tantric sex for a deeper, more sensually-informed sexuality can start by knowing themselves more fully. Masturbation and self-love are key to understanding your own sexual triggers. In knowing these, you’ll be better equipped to enjoy the sexual journey by delaying orgasm.
And once you’ve got a handle on who you are sexually, you’re ready for tantric love with a partner. Partnered sex, regardless of who you are or what your sex, sexuality, or gender is, unites energies that are embodied in the two sexes but diffused throughout the universe.
Regardless of your physical/gender status, these are embodied in your sexual personality and called forth in the act of tantric love. By slowing down to know your body intimately, you’re better prepared to approach tantra in partnered sex. Exploration, sensitively acknowledging the healing role of sexual union in the cosmic order, is where your own healing is achieved. Tantric sex is a tool for those who seek what the spiritual side of sex offers, beyond procreation and self-focused pleasure.
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